1.5M ratings
277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
thisurlwasnttakenbutnowitis
prestige2008

things ytp has immortalized as the absolute apexes of comedy:

  • the sound of glass breaking when something collides with a surface that isnt made of glass
  • random sharp increases in volume
  • reversing a word in the middle of it being said
  • reversing someone running/falling as its happening
  • audiovisual stuttering
  • amazingly coherent sentence mixing that makes no sense
  • screaming
  • overlaying cdi characters for half a second whenever someone says something like “boy” or “dinner”
iamoutofideas

Getting random midwestern teenagers into small movie studio levels of video editing & animation by putting CD-I mario wherever the hell they can put him

Source: prestige2008
hungwy
captainsnoop

i feel like counter-trolling is an essential skill that kids online aren’t learning and it’s kinda worrying

like back in my day, the day of online forums, learning how to trick someone in to getting themselves banned was an essential skill. if you could tell someone was a chud, you would ask them short, leading questions and watch them get frustrated and post longer and longer rants until they said something that would catch a mod’s attention and get them banned and/or at least publicly humiliated. 

and guess what? that’s the exact same tactics the alt-right use now. these people are exclusively acting in bad faith. every interaction these people post online is done with the intention of getting someone to respond to them so they can screenshot the massive paragraphs of text and laugh

so, what’s the solution?

dare ‘em to post dick pics.

don’t acknowledge the content of the stuff they post. if you see someone trying to engage you in bad faith just dare them to post pictures of their penis until they either get frustrated and leave or get frustrated and do it. either way they lose. 

this is the tactic used by the fans of a podcast (that i haven’t listened to) called the Chapo Trap House, and 4chan’s /pol/ users fucking HATE them. they hate Chapo Trap House and think they’re crazy because Chapo Trap House fans refuse to engage in meaningful debate and repeatedly demand dick pics. they get frustrated and leave. it works. 

mr-elementle

Some of you never used your position as a mod on an a series of unfortunate events forum to get a racist troll to post evidence of their tax fraud and it shows

actualaster

…that second comment is oddly specific and I’m a little scared

Source: captainsnoop
thisurlwasnttakenbutnowitis
striders

Hey is the build a bear employee supposed to force us to jump up and down or are we getting hazed

girl-in-the-hitops

as a build-a-bear employee it is my honor to happily inform you that we get to make everyone do whatever the fuck we want during a heart ceremony. jump to get that heart beating. rub that heart to your knees so your furry friend always needs you. rub it to your toes so it’s totally awesome! shake it up so it’s got enough energy to hang out with you all day! close your eyes, make a wish, and give it a kiss you helpless motherfucker

Source: striders
hungwy
violetohara

Tiny dirty stray kitten hanging out at the bottom of our stairs since yesterday. There are a lot of self-reliant ferals around our apartment, but this little thing was dirty & covered in burrs. We gave it some chicken but couldn’t catch it. I think it may have wandered over from the outdoor cat hoarder colony down the street; that house is awful & we saw kittens there last week.

This morning the downstairs neighbor managed to grab it for us, and I put it on this cozy towel & started combing and picking the burrs & sticks out of its fur. It calmed down immediately and has been chilling here with me in the kitchen ever since. Got a vet appointment in an hour to get my little buddy cleaned up & checked out. I hope it isn’t too sick; I think it might have a cold.

If we can, we are probably going to keep her.

violetohara

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What a difference a day makes! Took this little guy to the vet, got the fleas and dirt washed off him, got some antibiotics for a slight cold, but he is otherwise fine. Kneading and purring up a storm, eating a lot and being heart-crushingly adorable. 

violetohara

We have named this glorious creature Nux.

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violetohara

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A little over a month later and Nux is growing into a very long and floppy shoulder cat!

conquerorwurm

Oh my god!!!!

the-polyhedron

i’m so happy for this cat i hope nux knows im proud of him

violetohara

I just told him!

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supersugoiboi

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Source: violetohara
mythicalwashrag
hatingongodot

It’s feminist for me to fantasize about a beefy country boy to lift things for me and introduce me to his goats, because it turns me on and is therefore empowering!!! Fuck you!!!!!!!

hatingongodot

Are there weird gender role issues here if he has a big appetite and I make a lot of food for him? NO, because I am also PEGGING HIM in this scenario!! I am the FARM DOMME

hatingongodot

I’m going back in time to cancel this post because I’ve been told this is categorized as horny on main. Frankly I don’t see how it is horny to want someone in scuffed jeans blush while letting you pet their sheep but I’ve been overruled and I have a career to consider so [REDACTED]

kryptonians

Julia I’m reporting you

kryptonians

Julia I’m just worried about the goats

hatingongodot

God okay you don’t understand, the goats initially are somewhat skittish but end up liking me right away, leading the farmboy to go “I’ve never seen them warm up to anyone so quickly before!” And we share a shy but tender glance as the sun sets, until a goat does something silly that makes us both break into laughter. The GOATS are ESSENTIAL in getting him to NUT IN ME

Source: hatingongodot